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Our Favorite Comic Strip Characters Weigh in on Health Care Reform: An Imagined Roundtable

October 10, 2011 By Leave a Comment

MODERTOR: Good Afternoon. A few of our Sunday Funnies favorites managed to sneak away from the old drawing board to offer their views on health care reform for Penciled Americans. I believe everyone knows each other, but I am going to go around the table and identify each of you by name so that Miss Buxley, who graciously has agreed to act as our stenographer, can take notes.

MISS BUXLEY: My pleasure. I was free today because General Halftrack is getting a hip replacement at the VA.

MODERATOR: I see that Mr. and Mrs. Dagwood Bumstead are here, as well as Mr. and Mrs. Ted Forth, and Dr. and Mrs. Rex Morgan, M.D. There’s Mr. Mark Trail — I’m sorry your lovely bride Cherry couldn’t make it. And is that Dennis Mitchell? Hello, young man. Please climb down from the table and sit in the chair next to Mr. Trail’s St. Bernard. Hans and Fritz Katzenjammer, kindly sit by me. And finally, Mr. Pinhead. Welcome to you all. I appreciate that you all took time out of your busy schedules to join today’s focus group.

DAGWOOD BUMSTEAD: One thing I would like to say from the get-go — I hope that any future health reform includes full coverage for sleep disorders. Mr. Dithers has been busting my you-know-what for years because I can’t stay awake in the office. Sure, it’s funny, but the writers will have to come up with something else because I certainly don’t find it very funny myself.

BLONDIE BUMSTEAD: I would like to add that I am desperate for my husband to get treatment for his snoring problem. And, confidentially, (in stage whisper) I think he may have some kind of absorption problem. He eats and eats but he’s still rail thin.

MODERATOR: Very interesting. Do you think that Dagwood’s idiopathic daytime sleepiness may be related to the fact that you and he only seem to age about one year in your comic strip for every ten years of real time?

DAGWOOD AND BLONDIE: Real time?

MARK TRAIL: Mr. Moderator, I myself would like to see legislation that would guarantee free preventative care to all Penciled Americans, including tetanus boosters, rabies vaccinations and at least fifty physical therapy visits per year. I also would like the freedom to choose non-preferred providers in cases of injuries sustained fighting off unscrupulous property developers who seem to worm their way into my story line at least once a month.

REX MORGAN: Mark, I’m a little offended. Having been your personal physician for years, as well as preferred provider for the entire syndicate, I think my standards of care are excellent. Have you ever had to wait to see me? My waiting room is always empty, isn’t it? And I keep telling you, if you didn’t get so darned close to those critters, you wouldn’t need a rabies series every couple of weeks.

ANDY: Grrrrrrrrrr…

MODERATOR: Um, Mr. Trail, please keep your St. Bernard under control. I would like to finish going around the room so everyone can have a chance to speak. How about you two, Ted and Sally?

SALLY: Is this question with respect to my professional position or with respect to my being a wife and mother?

TED: Oh, boy. Here we go.

SALLY: I must qualify any statement I make because I am the plan administrator for my company’s health plan and I am not in a position to comment on any inadequacies of the plan because it would be a conflict of interest and …

TED: Yeah, the mental health coverage stinks.

SALLY: I cannot go on record one way or the other, but my husband certainly is entitled to his opinion.

TED: What if they covered breast augmentation surgery, Sal? That might be preferable to a mental health benefit.

JUNE MORGAN: I believe that we all are here in the Funnies for a purpose, whether Daily or Sunday, above or below the fold, or on the first, middle or back page. We are here to entertain our readers and, if possible, achieve some self-actualization in the process. I myself find the current state of health care for the Penciled Community just fine. Some of our special characters, such as Mr. Zippy sitting beside me at this table, have managed to succeed in spite of the drafting limitations of their creators. They are beloved around the world for themselves, just the way they are. If Rex or I ever were asked to serve on an Erasure Panel, we never would allow Mr. Zippy or any member of his lovely but funkily inked family to be erased.

ZIPPY: (one hand clapping)

MODERATOR: A final comment from the youngsters. Dennis, Katzenjammers, please give us your thoughts.

DENNIS: Ironically, if I were old enough to vote, I would vote for free growth hormone injections on demand. I am sick of being seven years old. I also think I could make an even bigger contribution to the world as a grown-up. I could even run for Congress.

HANS AND FRITZ : (in unison as they jump on their chairs) Vee tink dat too much dollars schpended on schtupid speech therapists vich does no gut becuz vee understant eeach otter pervectly allreddy!

SALLY: (in a low tone to Moderator) Did those two ever get naturalized? Do they even have standing to join this discussion of Pencilled American Citizens?

MODERATOR: Thank you, everyone, for coming.

Written by JeanBeu

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The Benefits Of Using Natural Health Care Products

October 10, 2011 By Leave a Comment

Article by Ken Barnes

Ours is a society consumed with the need to be healthy and beautiful. In the past pharmaceutical companies have made a small fortune capitalizing on the need of millions to appear young and attractive throughout their lifetime; however, the times, they are a changin’.

In recent years the wars between pharmaceuticals and homoeopathic remedies has raged fiercely-and natural health care products are coming back in style.

A few short centuries ago men and women didn’t have antibiotics, opiates or thousands of vitamins designed to keep them healthy. They relied entirely on natural health care products to do the job. In time, progress brought us chemicals, surgeries and a million artificial ways to keep our bodies healthy.

The problem is, the human body is a very precise system. Not enough calcium, your bones become brittle. Too much potassium and your heart stops. Yes, these are extremes (for everyone who just looked at their bananas in horror!) and unlikely to happen in the course of everyday living, but you get the picture.

When we fill our bodies with chemicals we may be doing some good things, but there’s a reason that all medications and vitamins come with warning labels and side effects. Our bodies aren’t meant to be filled with chemicals. Why do you think processed and preserved foods are so bad for you? Our bodies need the all natural ingredients they’re made from, which is why natural health care products are coming back into style.

Studies have shown throughout the years that natural health care products can be as effective as the industrially manufactured variety for treating various ailments. We use honey to coat a sore throat and soothe a cough, feverfew to treat migraines (an herbal therapy recommended by many neurologists), ginger to treat nausea (in the form of tea and ginger ale), and cayenne to soothe inflammation in the stomach and intestine. We take vitamin C to treat the common cold and aloe vera to soothe sunburn.

In fact, you’ve probably been using natural health care products most of your life and not even realized it!

Aside from promoting your general health in ways that don’t cause nasty side effects and allergic reactions on a regular basis, natural health care products also tend to come with a slightly lower price tag than their pharmaceutical counterparts-a bonus for anyone. This isn’t always the case, since fresh ingredients may cost more to obtain than their synthesized counterparts, but it applies often enough to balance out the difference.

When it comes to treating your body, natural health care products are the preferred choice of cells and organs everywhere.

Natural Health Products are proving to be of major health benefit throughout the world, try Natural Alternative Products for a huge range of natural products.

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Alternative Health Care

October 10, 2011 By Leave a Comment

There is a need for self education on natural health care.

Herbs are strong medicine and can interfere with prescription drugs or interact badly to produce severe side effects.  However, if you’re educated in the ways of herbal and other alternative medicines they are much safer and less likely to produce side effects than conventional medicine.  It’s time we took responsibility for our own health instead of putting all that responsibility on an already over worked health care system.

Unfortunately buying these herbs and supplements and paying out of pocket for alternative health care is expensive and those who need help the most can’t afford it, as insurance covers nothing “natural” or complementary and alternative.  To make the situation worse, our food supply is contaminated.  Yes, contaminated.  Inexpensive food that is affordable to the lower income families is packed to overflowing with preservatives to give them a long shelf life and additives to make the color more appealing and to enhance the taste.  Our bodies aren’t designed to filter out that overload of chemicals and eventually, usually sooner rather than later, the health breaks down and various diseases pop up.  The medication used by conventional medicine to control these diseases often times produces a break-down in another part of the system, which is treated with yet another drug, and the cycle repeats.

To take responsibility for our own health requires not only rethinking our diet and lifestyle, but also changing the  “there’s a pill for that” mind-set.  Prevention should be the greatest part of our health care from the cradle to the grave.  Thanks to the internet, you don’t have to spend a lot of money to educate yourself on natural health care, but one word of caution.  Don’t take just one author’s opinion or test results.  Research, research, research.  Compare data.  Trust your instincts.  After doing the research and comparing data some will decide one way and some will decide another.  One person may decide that dandelion leaf is sufficient to keep their kidneys healthy while another may decide, based on their symptoms, and lifestyle that they need uva ursa or nettle or a combination of several herbs.  If in doubt, there are many natural health forums and e mail groups with seasoned veterans in natural health.  Join some of them, ask questions, and again compare data before deciding.

 

Written by thebeaddoodler
Professional beader and bead pattern designer, herbologist, reflexologist, freelance writer

In August, Whole Foods CEO John Mackey argued in the pages of the Wall Street Journal that the solution to America’s health care crisis was to be found in “less government control and more individual empowerment.” His own company’s unique health care plan, Mackey wrote, covers 90 percent of employees, costs less than health insurance plans, aned provides a “very high degree of worker satisfaction.” But for the sin of not supporting a government take over of health care, labor unions and left-wing activists called for a boycott of Whole Foods, claiming that Mackey’s solutions were unworkable and his employees were unhappy. Reason.tv talked to protesters, Mackey, and employees about “the Whole Foods alternative to ObamaCare.” Produced by Michael C. Moynihan and Dan Hayes. Edited by Dan Hayes. Approximately 5 minutes. (Full disclosure: Mackey has contributed to Reason Foundation, the nonprofit that publishes this website.) Related video: John Mackey’s Conscious Capitalism: The Whole Foods CEO on health care, veganism, and free markets: www.youtube.com Go to reason.tv for downloadable versions of these and other videos.
Video Rating: 4 / 5

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